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Why I Asked for a Divorce and the Lessons I have Learnt


I had quite an interesting conversation with someone who asked that I do not blog on this matter. These were my responses to the person, don’t worry, the aim of my blog is ministry oriented; it’s not to condemn. The reason this person gave was that they felt it was a bit private. Unfortunately, in the part of the world we come from, we are thought to bottle things in. And that’s what you know best to do, that’s okay. I figured because they thought I would implicate their relation. That’s not the goal of my blogs at all.

My sister was in a particular season of her life. She won’t listen to anyone in a specific situation. she has a few men of God she listens to, so I said to her one day, I told her Even if and I mentioned a few of the men of God she respected, I told her I didn’t think she will even listen to these men unless she heard from God. She will fast for days with no food and no water, and I will be so fascinated and at times worried for her. She will always tell me that when the time comes, I will understand.


I honestly don't fully understand what God is doing with me, and I do not have to understand it fully. I have to obey. There is nothing like a private life when you walk in destiny and purpose. You do not live according to the precepts of men. God usually uses the foolish things of this world to confound the wise. A friend told me yesterday. AA, you don’t have to explain yourself to anyone, let God do the explaining, and he is right. As I also stated yesterday, my blogs will not be for everyone.

Anyway, let’s jump right in. Why did I ask for a divorce? For Me, one of the reasons was for greener pastures, amongst many other reasons. I saw a repetition of something, and I vowed not to allow that to happen. I hated that season of my life so much I couldn’t wait to slide into what I will call my fairy-tail relationship. No need for details, but I had a broken consciousness of this void that needed to be filled. My ex-husband had his issues, and as I said in my blog the other day about my relationship with my ex. This man that he is today wasn’t him some nine-plus years ago. He had his fair share in the matter. It takes two to build a house, and it takes two to destroy it.


For me, the biggest lesson here is there is nothing like greener pastures which I want my loyal readers and those who want to glean something from this to take home. You can leave a marriage for obvious reasons, which I had many at the time, but what I want to horn on is it should not be because you are going to seek greener pastures. After all, that is a fantasy. There is no such thing.


The only person who gives greener pastures is God. Many people have experienced marital and relationship issues, and they will not speak because it’s their private life, some due to fear of stigmatization. My question to you today is, If you don’t talk about it, what good are you doing your children and the up and coming so they continue these generational cycles?

Please make this blog as interactive as possible today with your take on greener pastures in marriage


Father, I pray that you will help us to renew our minds and to walk in purpose and destiny even if it means becoming vulnerable. Shalom


Adobea,(Imani)



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